A Tale of Woe And Technology

Oh No! A wild blue screen appears/ error message appears. You are a {Female Human}, the {wife} of a deployed techno-geek. You stare at the disabled screen. It stands between you and your goal of internet usage/gaming/media. Your {husband} won't return for months. The fate of your entertainment rests solely in your hands.

Step 1:
You stare at the screen. It stares back, unblinking. There is only one course open to you. You move, with reflexes fast as lightning, and reach for the power button. Without mercy or regret you hold the button down until the lights of technology dim, and eventually die. You wait. The seconds stretch on. 1, 2, 3.... 14, 15... you reach for the power button and press it, tentatively. The machine springs to life. You feel hope.

A: The technology responds to your power. You are the master of your domain. None can stand against you.    Proceed with your entertainment of choice.

B: Crap. Nothing happens.
Proceed to step 2.

Step 2:
The machine has called your bluff. It fears you not. This doesn't concern you, for you have another trick up your sleeve. You let the machine believe you are losing ground. It suspects nothing. Without hesitation you repeat your previous action. The machine is powerless. This time, however, you do not revive it immediately. You are a cunning warrior and learn from failure. You reach behind the machine and remove it's cables. They are it's life line. Without them it is powerless. You implore to it's sense of self-preservation. You plug the cables back in and press the power button. Nothing happens because you plugged something in wrong. You sigh dramatically, and shift the cables to their proper positions. Your offspring demand your attention and you grow weary of your current task. Best to end this quickly. You press the power button, and the machine springs to life once more.

A: Success. All the Media are belong to you. Spoils to the victor.

B: Crap. Nothing happens. Seriously?
Proceed to Step 3.

Step 3:
You are frustrated and your offspring are demanding nourishment. You no longer have the time or patience to deal with this technological menace. Screw it. Your {husband} will be home in a few months and can fix it then. It's {his} job anyway, right? You can find other ways to entertain yourself without this machine. You didn't really want to use it anyway. Glare at it menacingly and return to the kitchen.