Deployment 2011

As we near the end of Deployment 2011 I feel the sudden urge to look back and reminisce. And no, I don't care that it hasn't ended yet. We're reminiscing.

I thought that it would feel longer than it has. I know logically that 3 months isn't very long, but when you are in it it's hard to gauge time. I mean, think back to what you were doing 3 months ago. That SEEMS like it was forever ago, doesn't it? Maybe dealing with this many time zones has finally torn a hole in the fabric of space and time? There is no way that months could have gone by. It feels like he just left (not that I don't want him home RIGHT THE HECK NOW!) .

Also, I expected that the girls would exhibit some sort of "misbehavior". People (military moms) usually have stories about how their husband left for a period of time and all hell broke loose and the children went insane and there were power struggles and monkeys were flying around the house. It sounds terrible. We didn't have any of that. Well... no more attitude than a 3 and 5 year old normally exhibit. If they didn't sass me on occasion then I would fear that I was raising obedient little automatons who trust what people say at face value and never question the status quo. That would be irresponsible parenting. Maybe things will change when they hit those fabled  "teenage years", but I won't know for 6 or 7 more years. I've said it before and I'll say it again: my children are bad-ass. They are a ton of fun and have only given me 3 grey hairs. 2 of those are from Abbi. Chris leaving didn't create any kind of "power vacuum" in the family. Maybe it's because we really are partners when it comes to raising the girls and so they see us as practically interchangeable. Or maybe it's because we have very few rules in the house and so there really isn't anything to rebel against. Or maybe they got together and decided I'm more pleasant when people aren't trying to drive me insane. The world may never know. No matter the reason, the girls have been a joy and a blessing in Chris's absence.

It hasn't all been sunshine and roses since he left, though. Just about everything that could have broken DID break. Let me make a little list of the things that managed to break/stop working in only 3 months:
-The lawnmower decided not to cut grass anymore a mere 9 days in to the deployment. Not helpful.
-The DVD player upstairs doesn't like to play movies unless I beat it mercilessly first. I'm not joking. I have to  use physical violence to play barbie movies for Abbi.
-The Adri + screwdriver + Chris's computer incident is well documented on FB.
-My computer can't figure out what a webcam is anymore. Techno-amnesia?
-Flat tire on the van. The day was saved thanks to my wonderful neighbor and substitute husband "Jebediah".
-Media server crashed and just sits there blinking it's stupid light at me.
-PS3 became incapable of playing blu-ray discs. PS3 also became incapable of playing video games. It's mostly just for show now, I guess.
-HTPC crashed and decided that it no longer wants to be a computer. It is pursuing it's dream of being a useless black box. It's pretty good at it, too.

These are all the things I can think of off the top of my head. Are they important and life ruining? No, most certainly not. Are they a nuisance that seems to keep growing? Yes.

I think back to Chris's first deployment and it seems so different. Adri was just an infant and our relationship was still so new. It was scary to be alone. This time around I was able to embrace the good parts, like being able to sleep in the middle of the bed and being able to keep any schedule I want because nobody has to wake up early. Being a mom was still new and scary then too. Now I'm fairly confidant that I won't screw up and ruin their lives, and that really takes quite a bit of the pressure off. Being a "solo-parent", as I call myself when my wingman is unavailable, is a good thing every now and again. You gain a better perspective of how much work really goes in to taking care of the kids and meeting their needs. You also gain a stronger appreciation for all the ways your partner helps you, especially in the ways that you don't even notice every day. It's the little things that end up being the most help. Every time I am stirring something on the stove a child needs my attention! It's a wonderful thing to be able to say "go ask daddy for help".
Having so much stuff break has been kind of good too. Makes me more appreciative of how much Chris manages to keep running with recycled equipment and relatively little money. He's a pretty thrifty techno-geek. It's impressive.

Even though it's still about 3ish weeks until we reach the finish line I feel confidant in saying that this deployment has been a positive experience. That being said, I am SO ready to have my husband home where he belongs. :)